Alexandre Dumas! Capital!
So I finished Dumas's The Count of Monte Cristo yesterday. Yes, the unabridged. Yes, all 1,100 pages of it. Yes, I die of melodrama.
While I did enjoy it and found it to be a remarkable work of fiction, I just can't help but think of some things.
- The French are not known for brevity. 1,100 pages! Really?
- It takes money, lots and lots of money (and gold coins, diamonds, and even slaves), to exact revenge.
- The French didn't say, "Awesome!" or "Great!" Instead, they blurt out, "Capital!"
- Good news if you find yourself in prison: Your cellmate just might be the raving lunatic who could make you rich.
- It's not enough that the novel focus on an adventure. There has to be a love story, and several women fainting for the slightest reasons.
- Only the rich can pull off a code name such as Sinbad the Sailor.
- If you find yourself forgetting a particular story line, don't fret—Dumas would provide a very detailed back story for your apparent short-term memory loss. 1,100 pages! Really?
- Only the rich can pull off a first name such as Valentine.
- If you want to read this, go for the unabridged. The dialogue is just capital!
- 1,100 pages in 117 chapters. That's about 9.40 pages per chapter. You can easily read 1 chapter while in the restroom, and possibly 2 or 3 if you're constipated.