Putting on snail goo and getting by without a deodorant

Today, let's talk about skincare, more specifically, facial skincare. One thing about me is that I thrive on routine. If something will have me do a series of actions repetitively at a constant time of day, I am in. I get antsy when my everyday normal is broken. Like something bad's going to happen. Like big bad. Like end-of-the-world bad. I wake up every day at 4, but for some strange reason, I wake up just a few minutes before my alarm goes off. On the very few days that I get woken up by that alarm, I feel so stressed already that I can't even do my usual morning toilet thingy. If I'm not at my desk by 6 and not having coffee by 6.30, there'll be lines on my forehead all morning. Like wrinkles.

And speaking of wrinkles, they're at the top of my concerns lately. More important than world peace and deep sea exploration. (World peace is a nice idea and everything, but honestly, farting rainbows or sweating glitter is far more achievable. We're too emotional as a species, too diverse in our thinking. I guess what we can do is to work toward WP. But let's face it, we'll never get there.) When I hit 40, I've googled "how to avoid getting wrinkles," "how to prevent having that old people smell," "should I sunblock?" and "paul rudd doesnt age, is he even human?"

Which, of course, leads me to skincare, specifically Asian skincare.

If you haven't an idea what makes Asian skincare different from, say, Western skincare methods, just google it. You'll be surprised by the number of steps it takes, usually 10 to 12 steps. I know someone who does 15. Of course, the more steps you do, the more people become more judgmental on your physical appearance. They be thinking, "Oy, those 15 steps aren't worth it. Look at her pores." I started with doing around 8. Now, I just stick to 5. And 3 if I'm too lazy, which is like 66.6% of the time.

I have terribly oily skin. Crack an egg on my face in the summer and I'm sure it'll get fried. My skin's terribly oily it gives Arab countries a run for their money. One thing going for it though, as many people say, is that it'll take some time before I get any wrinkles. But I still don't wanna get there, no? Also, I don't think it's necessarily true, as I noticed a few lines here and there, mostly around the eye area. (That's why when I know a pic is going to be a little bit of a close up, I'd prefer not to fully smile. Better a resting bitch face than one with wrinkles.) Then there's the bf, who has such beautiful skin that I kinda hate him for it. I kid, of course. When we have pics together, I thank the gods for those photo filters. I have thicker hair though. So there's that. Small victories.

Anyway, I fell for the discipline that this skincare entails. In the evenings, first I wash my face with an oil cleanser. Then I wipe it dry or rinse it with lukewarm water. I usually do this in the shower though. Saves me the effort of cleaning up the sink because I'm, like, splashy all over the place when I do everything at the sink. Second, I use a facial cleanser to cleanse for the second time. Double cleansing, guys. Literally life changing. Then I pat dry, and, third, I apply a toner. This is where my geeky self rejoices, as toning has something to do with bringing your skin's pH to the correct level. The last time I used pH in writing was back in college, during titration lessons, when I pretended that I really was interested. (Back in college, for classes that are really difficult, I always sat in front and put on a very enthusiastic face. Then I stayed a few minutes after class to ask the professor, "Sir, can you recommend other books to read on the topic?" I actually think they creamed their pants answering this. But of course, I was just putting on a show. Was just trying to earn bonus points.)

So now I'm a third of the way done with the routine. Fourth, I put on exfoliants, which is something I try not to skip because, again, oily skin. It's BHA (for blackheads) first, then a 20-minute wait, then AHA (for whiteheads), then another 20-minute wait before I go on with the fifth step, putting on essence. Ah, essence, a few years ago, if you told me that I'll be putting on snail slime on my face, I'd stab you with a blunt knife. But it's become my go-to ingredient for an essence. That thing actually works. Snail goo does wonders for those fine lines. I'm not too sure what kind of snails they get the slime from, but I think it ain't the garden variety, the ones you pick, lay on the ground, put salt on, and watch in glee while the poor mollusks writhe and bubble. So sorry for this, snails. I know karma's a bitch, so I hope I won't be a snail in my next life.

So I'm almost all the way through. Sixth, I put on a face mask on most days, or when I've a special event the following day. The face mask thing goes on my face for at least 30 minutes. Most instructions for these would say to put them on for only 15 to 20 minutes. But these things can be costly, so I'll milk the hell out of them. Also, I get a lot of reading while having a face mask on. Although it looks weird to have a lie in bed with a face mask with my reading glasses. So, privacy. Then finally, I take the mask off and put on a moisturizer. (The term moisturizer is so 90s and 00s. I believe it's called hydrating lotion now. I am shookt.) In the morning, I'd repeat the same steps but leave out the exfoliants and masks but put on a sunblock as the last step. The sunblock is supposedly the most important step. Never mind that the sun powers the process of photosynthesis or that it's the ultimate source of energy on our planet. The sun isn't your skin's best friend.

Have I exhausted you with these steps, dear readers? Just imagine doing them every night for more than a year, then we'll talk. All these usually take about more an hour at least. But I've managed to sneak a few tasks during the wait times. Like check Instagram or read. Or prepare my overnight oats, because I can't get enough of fiber. Funny thing is, there's a ton of product on my face, but I've managed to skip another product altogether, the deodorant. I noticed my father doesn't use one, and his siblings too. So, being the amateur scientist that I am, I experimented. I skipped deodorant for a week, and there hasn't been any effect (i.e., no body odor). Of course, I had to go the restroom every now and then to check, and I carried a deodorant in my bag just in case. But there hasn't been any smell. But I need more robust data. So I didn't use deodorant when I exercised and rode the bike. Happy dance all around, as there still wasn't any smell. I read somewhere that there's a small percentage of people who can get by without using deodorant. Something to do with possessing a gene or something that inhibits bacterial growth.

I asked an officemate to buy me chia seeds at an outlet store,
as they're terribly expensive at Healthy Options.
She bought this.
So now I have a year's supply.

I'm still not sold on eye creams though. I tried using three different brands before and I wasn't able to note any changes. And they're quite costly. When a product costs for a significant fraction of my salary, then it better work. I've no patience anymore to keep on testing, so I decided to make do without. Also, another product that I've been using less is shampoo. I used to shampoo every day. Now I'd jsut go with once every week. Sometimes I'd go for 2 weeks without using it, and it's perfectly fine. (Fine meaning no dandruff, no falling hair, no oiliness, no lice and other creatures making an ecosystem on my scalp.) So all the spare bottles of shampoo that I bought before are for my dad, who uses shampoo a lot. And he doesn't even have long hair.

This weekend's books in my bag. Still reading these. The Good Son is proving to be one thrilling read. I love unreliable narrators in novels—Briony Tallis in Atonement, Amy and Nick in Gone Girl, Frank Cauldhame in The Wasp Factory, and Merricat Blackwood in We Have Always Lived in the Castle. I love it when I read something that I don't see coming. And when the reveal is so shocking I'm floored.

Gimme good food

Eat food. Not too much. Mostly plants. These three statements represent what Michael Pollan advises us to do in his latest book, In Defense of Food: An Eater's Manifesto. Now why would a person tell us to "eat food" since haven't we all been eating this stuff since the day we were born? Pollan argues that what we've been eating lately couldn't be categorized a food. Edible stuff that contains unpronounceable ingredients, preservatives, and flavoring designed to imitate natural flavor can not be called food.

Just think about it. When was the last time you had a meal that did not have any artificial flavorings, had not undergone any processing whatsoever, and did not include refined flour, refined sugar, and high-fructose corn syrup? According to Pollan, these additives constitute what he calls the Western diet, a way of eating that has negative consequences on our health and the environment. Alarmingly, more and more people across the world are starting to follow this diet, foregoing their healthier traditional eating habits in favor of fast, high-calorie, and nutritionally deficient meals.

Pollan studies where have people, Americans in particular, have started to get it all wrong in terms of their diet. For a people who are obsessed with staying young and being healthy, Americans have high rates of heart diseases, diabetes, and obesity. If you stroll along the aisles of American supermarkets, labels scream "low fat," "cholesterol free," "fortified with vitamins and minerals," and "approved by the American Heart Association." So what exactly is the culprit to the increasing predisposition of people to chronic diseases? Pollan argues that it has something to do with the changes on how we look at the stuff we put in our mouths.

The culprit, according to Pollan, is nutritionism, an ideology wherein people pay more attention to the nutrients found in food than in the whole food itself. There's just too many things we don't know about the stuff that makes up food. Take, for instance, the whole brouhaha about fats. Before, margarine was promoted as a healthier alternative to butter because the fat in margarine comes from plants. But since plant fat is usually liquid at room temperature, people have hydrogenated the fat so that it becomes solid, resulting in margarine. But now we know that this hydrogenation process is so unhealthy because it converts plant fat to saturated fat.

In the early part of the 20th century, fat was deemed as the culprit. Lately, however, scientific studies have shown that fat, whether animal or plant fat, in diets does not equate to having heart diseases. In fact, scientists are slowly coming to accept the fact that they might have been wrong about fat in the first place. Humans are omnivores, and we're biologically programmed to consume fat. (Our cells have membranes with large fat components; cells in our brain are covered with fat.)

Perhaps it was wrong to reduce food into its component nutrients and study these separately. We can't just fortify foods with these nutrients because their effects vary when they're taken out of their natural source. It is this reason why supplements don't seem to have any effects. It is way better to get your dose of vitamin C by eating fruits and vegetables than taking a pill. There may be certain compounds in these natural food that allow our body to absorb and use vitamin C more efficiently.

We've become part of a culture that view eating as simply a necessity, not as an integral part of the day wherein we also get to catch up with our family and friends during dinnertime conversations. We take our lunches on our desks and while we're driving, as if eating has become a hindrance to our productivity at work. Food has become cheap that we consume large servings of it. All these must change, Pollan says. We have to remember the time when food was part of our culture, a celebration of the gustatory pleasures that food brings.

And why should we eat more plants? Because plants have a variety of nutrients that's good for us; it's as simple as that. They have loads of antioxidants, whose effects may not be as powerful if they're taken as supplements. In some cases, these antioxidants when taken in pill form, do more harm than good; they become oxidants. I'm reminded of my biology professor's argument in favor of going vegetarian. The lower you are in the food chain, the less food you have to consume to get all the nutrients and calories that you need.

In Defense of Food is an eye opener. It shows us that there's so much to find out about food and that what we do know about it is limited and, at times, can be so wrong. It will make you assess your eating habits and will provide suggestions on what you can do about these unhealthy habits practices.

Read this book if:

1. You're clueless about what you're putting in your mouth.
2. You want to know what's all the fuss about omega-3.
3. You want one good reason for liking butter.